i need to whine!

i can't believe it's after 3pm already. i've done nothing today. nothing. i feel like crap. i'm tired. i haven't had a restful night's sleep in a while cause we desperately need a new mattress. it's so uncomfortable & painful. we flipped & rotated it last night, can't tell if it's helping yet. i've got HUGE, painful pimples on my face (mainly on my chin) that aren't going away. no matter how much i scrub and put stuff on them. i've got a headache & my head's all congested. i'm hungry lately ALL THE TIME! today i'm also on the verge of tears for some unknown reason. i'm a writer. i'm supposed to be a writer and i can't write. i don't write. i don't know what's wrong with me sometimes.

Hello! Not 16 Anymore!

Gad! No wonder people have a hard time believing I am in my 30s! The Enbrel shots cleared up my skin. The Remicade makes me more oily than a grease vat! And I have a painful game of connect the dots going on on my face!

I did it! I'm finished!

yippie! happy dance!

made my last tuition payment & submitted my final exam for my gardening and landscape design course this afternoon! got a 90% on the exam (cause i marked the wrong spot for 1 answer ~ dang it! the other i just plain got wrong!), so my overall gpa for the course is 93%!

A Nasty Day Ends with a Pleasant Surprise!

yeesh! yesterday started off with a NASTY sinus headache on top of my cold! i was in bed until about 3:30 yesterday afternoon! throughout the day i was also getting either back spasms or stabbing kidney pains on my right side, so i'm not sure if my back's acting up or if i've got kidney stones again!

i took my 2nd to last exam for my gardening & landscape design class and got a 75% on it (my lowest grade for the entire course!) but at least i passed! got 1 left and i plan to take that later today!

once i was finally up & about, i took some garbage out & found the beauties in the pics above just outside my fence by a tree! (only they had no pots!) guess someone decided they'd had enough of their easter flowers! i was so excited & uplifted by this find! ('a gift' as i called it!) ok, that's actually an understatement! i was giddy over it! (yup, i'm a gardening geek through & through!) once they're done blooming, i can either leave them as is or dig 'em up, dry 'em out & save them for next year & 'force' grow them in the house! i immediately gathered them up and found a pot for them with some extra soil! i've got them out on the patio table where i can see them from the kitchen and 2 stalks of blooms in the bedroom on top of the computer hutch!

Front Porch Sittin!

A beautiful end to the day! The wind finally died down, the clouds skeedattled, the sun came out fully and it got up to 62 degrees around 4pm! Sounds like there is another brush fire down the highway from here - firetruck and first aid sirens are screaming from every direction around here! Only gets like this when there is a brush fire. Hubby is over at the high school for computer class. I dont usually sit on the front porch, but this is where all the sun is at this time of year so its still too chilly to be out back. Ive been feeling a little restless and wanting to be outside lately! So here I am, sitting on the front porch amongst my pots of flowers which are just beginning to wake and turn green! Also lately the idea of living with less has been on my mind. Ive been going to the library to save $ and at 1st thats why I stayed away from the thrift shop, but I realized Im more aware of what and how much Im bringing home and I want to get rid of excess stuff at home!

Loud Girly Screams And Squeals!

Just got 2 3rd row tickets for May 23 to see the country music cutie above! He has an amazing voice! I am so excited!

well friends, i've been blessed with the gift of time again since my social security disability has been approved! since i really don't know how to NOT worry about everything & anything, it's going to be a while before i unwind! i'm hoping this will help with my overall physical health too. in the mean time, i'm going to concentrate on my writing and finishing my online courses.

i woke with a cold coming on today & i'm so very tired, but, things are actually going to be ok now! i'm so very thankful! you have no idea!

A Happy Easter Indeed!

This is 1 of our 9 grand nieces! Such a sweetie! We got the judges decision about my social security disability in the mail yesterday - it is fully favorable to me, so I guess in soc sec speak it means I got approved!

oh what a beautiful day! yes, it's raining! but the air smells sweet & spring-y and the cardinals & mocking birds are calling!

i sent an email this morning to a local soup kitchen, that also provides clothing & other necessities, asking if they would take used books and let the patrons go through them & take what they like ~ my only conditions are that patrons are asked to return books they don't want to keep so that others can read them if they wish and that none of the books are thrown away by the soup kitchen! if they wish to stop having them or if some of the books remain a long time while others are taken, they can contact me and i'll take those books back and find another place to bring them to (maybe the local senior housing). i hope i get a positive response! otherwise, i'll figure out something else!

tomorrow is not only the 1st day of spring, but holy thursday for catholic's & christians! followed by good friday and then sunday is easter! already! and since we've already had the the daylight savings time change (on 3/9), april is looking like a pretty un-festive month this year!

last night i started trying to sort through & figure out what's going on with my female main character from a novel i started toying around with in 11/2006. the idea had a very distinct direction in the beginning. now, not so much! but, i need to buckle down and get cracking on it if i'm ever going to make something of it!

see, we saw a friend at a foodstore over the weekend, who's a very young widow. she's not much older than i & younger than hubby. 2 years ago, her husband passed away from cancer after years long, horrendous battle with the illness. she's done amazingly well since and she's been able to take care of herself and their home on her own as well. now, i don't know anything about whether or not he had any type of life insurance and that's not what i'm talking about.

seeing her brought home to me again the fact that i really need to do something with myself & for myself in case anything happens to hubby, so that i can take care of myself and be on my own if i have to be. or, as in the case with my sister-in-law, become the main income earner (my brother-in-law had a massive stroke & congestive heart failure the year before last and is no longer mentally or physically able to work at all).

now, i recognize the fact that this isn't easy for me with having health problems! i can't work in a traditional type of job or setting, i know that without a doubt. who knows if i can make a living at writing, but i've really got to try!

but, whatever i end up doing to make a living won't just benefit me in case anything happens ~ it will benefit both hubby and myself regardless!

Happy St. Patty's Day! (*Updated!)

and a beautiful day it is!

yup, i'm wearing green! i had 2 slices of irish soda bread, toasted w/ a little butter & jelly, for breakfast! (bought at acme foodstore & i'm quite impressed because it's delicious!) and i've got the st. patty's day parade from nyc on the tv!

just before 1pm i started the corn beef brisket in the crock pot! i've never made it before, so i hope it comes out good! about an hour before it's done i've got to add the potato's & maybe carrots and a half hour before it's done i have to add the cabbage & onions.

i'm feeling rather festive today! not sure why. i miss my nana a lot around st. patty's day! she was irish and growing up i thought today was as important to her as any other holiday!

*my 1st corn beef, cabbage & potato dinner was a success! hubby & mom both liked it! (i thought it was pretty good too!) i've decided it's now going to be a tradition on this here day! (i didn't add the carrotts i mentioned above!) tomorrow i'll post the recipe!

during the parade, they switched coverage to the swearing in ceremony of ny's new governor, david paterson, and let me tell you, i am so glad i watched it! that man is an AMAZING speaker! i wish he were running for president!

anyway, after dinner, hubby & i watched a short documentary about the history of celtic music then watched the documentaries on our "the quiet man" dvd ~ a john wayne & maureen o'hara movie, set in ireland, made in the early 50's. (we've seen the movie a lot, but never watched the dvd extra's!)

hubby's sleeping now & i think i'm going to climb back into bed as well!

just think ~ easter begins with holy thursday, this thursday! only 3 days away!

Yup, She Eats Yogurt!

Any flavor, really! This happens to be strawberry banana and not 1 of my favs! Cats and dogs can be so surprising and funny! She also likes chocolate Ensure (vitamin drink!), strawberry and mint chocolate chip ice cream and spaghetti sauce!

i now believe in the power of vitamin d!

i started taking calcium with vitamin d(3) sometime last year, either late summer or fall. almost immediately i noticed a drastic change in my pain & swelling levels, overall. i’d only been taking it about a week! the only thing i was doing differently at that time was that i’d started taking the supplement! (my obgyn had been bugging me to start calcium supplements, blah, blah, blah...!)

i did a bit of hunting around out in cyber space and found that vitamin d deficency has been linked to all kinds of things like depression, autoimmune diseases like lupus, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia and others! i was surprised to learn this as i’ve had a "compromised" immune system for about 15 years or so (that’s when i started getting sick at least) and not 1 doctor i’ve ever been to ever mentioned that 1 of the possible causes could be vitamin deficency! but, it made sense to me!

more recently, i read an article in the january/february edition of mother earth news magazine that vitamin d(3) has helped patients of 1 of the doctors interviewed with their pain & swelling levels!

at some point before the end of 2007, i was sick (again) and fell off the vitamin taking bandwagon for a couple of weeks. after about 2 weeks, i noticed that my pain & swelling levels sky rocketed! not to mention that my mood tanked big time! i thought it may have something to do with my not taking the vitamins!
well, i’ve been off my vitamins again for about 2 weeks after being sick & trying to recover and a couple of days ago, my pain level started going through the roof again! and now my swelling is starting to get bad as well. my mood has been in the toilet! overall i’ve felt like crap! last night, i started taking my vitamins again!

hey, if it works for me, great! i need all the help i can get! but, i’m definately a firm believer now!

(ps ~ i take the following: 250mg/magnesium, 1000iu/d(3), 500mg/200iu/calcium&d(3), 1000mg/c&rose hips, 200iu/e and 10,000iu/a ~ i take the d(3), calcium & c twice a day ~ if i’m not getting sick to my stomach & queasy, i take the c 3 times a day when i’m sick with a cold, bronchitis, strep, tonsilitis, etc..)

Hi All! Guess What?!

i've got 2 exams left and a total of of $55.48 due for my gardening & landscape design course! this means i'll finish on time, by/before the end of march 2008, exactly 2 years from when i first signed up & rec'd my initial materials! (march, 2006) my overall grade average is 94% to date! once i get through the last 2 exams & payment, i'll receive a certificate!

(i've still got a ways to go on my interior design course! i started it in 2007).

The Snow Drops Are Up!

My Aunt told me the wk before that the Snow Drops were up all over her property! The ones here turned up the end of last wk but I never got around to taking a pic! I am sorry to see Winter go, especially since we had more warm weather than cold and only 1 substantial snow fall! But the gardening bug has me itchin again!

Lost Another 3lbs!

That makes 14 total so far! Yippie!

Gonna Be A 3 Cat Night!

They have the right idea! A nasty rain storm has just begun and it has been raw all day! I have been watching and taping a couple of Rebeccas Garden dvds I picked up at the library yesterday! (I LOVE GARDENING!) Not much else got done today since I have had another nasty sinus headache from the i.v. med!

today's the 1st day in ages...

that i'm wearing sweat pants and i don't look huge! i've lost 11 lbs as of my dr's appt on monday & i changed what i eat & how much i eat throughout my day in january ~ only 59lbs more to go to lose the total of 70 lbs i've gained since getting hurt @ work in 2004!

speaking of my dr's appt on monday, my obgyn says everything's fine ~ no fibroid tumor and no miscarriage. the double periods are from the birth control pill i'm on. (i sure don't remember him telling me that when he prescribed it 3 years ago!!!) i have an appt with my rheumatoidologist next wednesday & my next iv treatment on friday, 3/14.

My Comfort For The Moment!

Thats my girl! Recently, Barbara from WritingTime.net called Booper gorgeous on her site after I posted the link to a pic of her on here! And that she is! I adore her in a different way than the other kitties! Today I find out if what I have been going through is an abnormal period or a miscarriage. I have an appt with my OBGYN this afternoon. My PCP thinks I way have a uterine fibroid but I doubt it since I have none of the symptoms! Regardless, I am getting butterflies in my stomach and my heart is racing a bit! I am not only worried about possibly miscarrying, but also that maybe my new iv med is not working they way it should on me. Ok, worried is an understatement! I am scared!